School-Readiness: Send Kindergarteners to School with These Key Social and Emotional Skills

Originally posted on my US News & World Report parenting blog (Aug 3)

FOR ALL PARENTS OF soon-to-be kindergarteners, by now, you’re well-acquainted with all the work that goes into preparing a child for school. Kindergarten readiness has long been associated with the ABCs and 123s, and understandably so. Mastering skills such as being able to count and recite the alphabet, and knowing one’s shapes and colors all serve to lay a strong foundation for reading, writing and arithmetic.

That said, it’s worth noting that an ability to develop and maintain relationships has recently been added to this list of so-called IQ skills. Its addition makes clear that social and emotional skills, along with several other skills often misleadingly described as “soft” and “non-cognitive,” are now being acknowledged as critical when it comes to school readiness.

Honing the ability to focus and pay attention, be a good listener, share, take turns and play nice with others may seem like common sense. Yet these types of “other” skills are now collectively being recognized to be of equal, if not greater importance, than IQ skills by everyone from educators, pediatricians and neuroscientists to economists, entrepreneurs and business leaders.

With that in mind, it’s important as the new school year begins that parents integrate teaching kids what I like to refer to as QI (think positive “life force”) skills as well, while helping them develop as students. This is something that you’ll want to do, of course, not just before their first day, but as they continue to grow and develop, both in the classroom and outside of it. Here’s a breakdown of QI skills – which I’ve also outlined in my book “The Toddler Brain” and my children’s book, “Jumping Into Kindergarten you’ll want to be sure to encourage and cultivate: ….

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Biting: What To Do When Toddlers Bite

Originally posted on my US News & World Report parenting blog (Dec 11)

A CONCERNED MOTHER recently reached out to a large virtual support group of fellow moms to seek advice regarding a distressing incident involving her young child. She described all sorts of challenges that commonly face working moms today, from the adjustment involved in heading back to work to all-important considerations regarding child care. But at the heart of this particular discussion was a subject that I have long found to be of universal interest to parents and others who take care of young kids: biting.

The virtual response this mom got to her tale of woe was impressive: Hundreds of other moms weighed in, sharing their own biting experiences, insights and frustrations. As I’ve found over several decades interacting with young children and their caregivers, biting can become the bane of a parent’s existence – whether you’re upset your child has been bitten, or the frustrated parent of a biter.

To tackle this issue, I’ve found it most useful for everyone involved to step away from the particular situation at hand – at least for a moment – and start with a clear understanding of what biting does, and doesn’t, represent.

The best way I’ve found to explain it is that biting happens to be the least socially acceptable of all of the predictable and developmentally normal behaviors of early childhood. The thought of one child trying to take a bite out of another child has come to be perceived as far more distasteful than, say, hitting, pinching, pushing, kicking, shrieking or any of a whole host of less-than-desirable toddler behaviors. There’s something about the discovery of a human bite mark on one’s child that parents find especially disturbing. However, a young child’s predilection to bite both friends and foes isn’t abnormal.

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Books and Young Children – 5 Reasons You Should Read Aloud to Your Kids

Originally posted on my US News & World Report parenting blog (Aug 17)

WHAT IF I WERE TO START this blog post with the phrase, “In a great green room…,” ask you what the brown bear sees, or simply inquire as to what very hungry caterpillars eat? I’m willing to bet that most of you, as parents (not to mention grandparents, child care providers and early educators), would be able to finish the sentence and answer the questions without pause.

I imagine that for many of you, these ever-so-simple references would likely also conjure up the colorful images and happy memories that tend to go hand in hand with reading such beloved children’s books as Margaret Wise Brown’s, “Goodnight Moon;” or “Brown Bear, Brown Bear” written by Bill Martin, Jr. and illustrated by Eric Carle; and “The Very Hungry Caterpillar,” written and illustrated by Carle. Yet all too often, I find that discussions about early literacy move away from what we all know and love about the experience of reading aloud with young children, and towards the more literal, academic advantages. That includes getting kids familiar with “sight words” – or commonly used words kids are encouraged to memorize, or know on sight; teaching them the sounds of letters; and all of the various other nuts and bolts of learning to read.

That’s not to say efforts focused on promoting early literacy and helping young children make the necessary connections between sounds, letters and words are without benefit. After all, learning to read affords children the ability to spend the rest of their lives reading to learn. There is no question that reading aloud with young children can facilitate their learning their ABCs and help set them up for reading and life success.

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Parenting & TED: Key Parenting Takeaways From the TED2017 Conference

Originally posted on my US News & World Report parenting blog (May 5, 2017)

AS ONE OF ONLY A FEW pediatricians at last week’s TED2017 conference in Vancouver, British Columbia, I want to let you in on a little secret I’m fairly sure most parents and conference attendees don’t know: The TED conference is actually a parentingconference.

Sure, influential people from around the globe gather to hear thought-provoking talks delivered on “the world’s largest stage.” But when you get right down to it, the 90-plus carefully curated talks collectively paint a picture of the world in which our children will live.

It is this glimpse into what the future holds for our kids that makes TED especially relevant to parents. Whether you’re the world’s greatest female athlete sharing thoughts on becoming a parent (as Serena Williams did), or a parent on the go, what unites us is our shared hopes and dreams for our children. The legacy we leave will depend on how well we prepare our children to live healthy, meaningful and productive lives in a rapidly changing, complex world. This makes parents the people most in need of knowing the direction in which the world is headed. Ironically, we are also the least likely to have enough spare time to watch a 15-minute video online. That’s why I’m so compelled to share a handful of key parenting takeaways from TED2017…

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An alternative to Valentine’s Day chocolate: reasons to dance your heart out!

Valentine’s Day is undeniably all about love and sweethearts. It’s also defined by the heartfelt gifts of chocolates, sweets and (candy) hearts so plentiful this time of year. Now it’s not that I think we need to do away with all of these sweet gifts in lieu of a more heart-healthy approach to Valentine’s Day. But it has occurred to me that this holiday could mean so much more when it comes to finding ways for our loved ones to have happy hearts.

To get you one step closer to achieving this goal, I’d like to suggest that you, your kids, and your sweetheart all get up and dance. That’s right…dance! There are several reasons why you and your family should put your best foot forward and get up and start dancing.

It’s Fun. Regardless of age, who doesn’t like putting on some music and just letting loose? The good news is that regular physical activity throughout the day (which could easily include dancing), improves sleep, reduces stress, and overall makes people feel better about themselves. So just break out those dancing shoes (and your toddler’s skid-free socks and tutus) and start dancing. For some added fun – grab your video camera and capture the moment(s). No rules, just fun.

It’s Exercise. I imagine you don’t need me to tell you that we’re in the middle of a nationwide childhood (and adult) obesity epidemic. The beauty of dancing is that it’s not work, it doesn’t require committing to regular trips to the gym, and it doesn’t cost a thing to break a sweat. Yet don’t let this lack of requirements deceive you into thinking it’s not exercise. In fact, First Lady Michelle Obama’s national Let’s Move! Campaign actively promotes the need for kids to get 60 minutes of moderate to vigorous active play every day. After all, when they (and you) simply get moving (or dancing!), it all adds up to building and keeping healthy bones, muscles and joints and achieving a healthy body weight.

It’s Quality Family Time. Whether you opt for a daddy-daughter dance, a dance contest, or a more freestyle approach to your family’s dancing, it all adds up to the potential for quality family time. With the hectic pace of parenthood and often over-scheduled childhood that defines the times, I would argue that protected quality time with the family – at the dinner table, during conversations with your child in the car, and when sharing fun family activities like dancing together – is invaluable.

And now for my timely and heart-warming news. As many of you may already know, in addition to being a pediatrician, I also own an educational childcare center – Primrose School of Legacy – located in West Omaha. As one of over 200 franchised centers across the country, I am particularly proud to share with you that from February 1st through March 19th, all your heart-felt family dancing can be for a very worthy cause! That’s because Primrose Schools is hosting the 2nd Annual National Family Dance-off Contest. This fun family-oriented dance-contest is open to all families and benefits the Children’s Miracle Network Hospitals. By simply uploading a 30-second video of your family’s most creative, unique, or amusing dance moves at www.FamilyDanceoff.com and/or making sure that you and everyone you know votes each day for your favorite Omaha video, you could be one of 14 weekly contest winners who receive a flip video camera and up to $5000, while also winning Children’s Hospital and Medical Center a chance at receiving a $15,000, $20,000, or even $30,000 donation from Primrose Schools!

Simply put, I want to see Omaha families and children getting healthy by eating healthier, getting up and moving, and dancing. And through March 19th, I more specifically hope you all will be dancing to win, not only for yourselves, but for Omaha’s Children’s Hospital and Medical Center. I guarantee you it will do your body, your family, and your heart some good!

Originally posted on Omaha World Herald’s Live Well Nebraska